Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Corner View California...where you go to just be

Solitude. I have some spectacular natural places that I feel particularly meditative in, but they're not just out my back door. And when I need solitude, I need it right then and there. I call it "space." When I need some space, I head for my bed, curl up, and let my mind spiral out.

I've been needing quite a bit of space lately. My mom passed away in March, and in a couple days we are journeying to where she wanted to return.

I could describe for you how beautiful this place is, how beautiful my mom, my thoughts on death and spirit.... The words arise but quickly dissolve, like a mirage, and I find myself, toes dangling, at the edge of the universe.

As cathartic as writing, friendship, and keeping busy have been, I am at a singularity. I can only be present. Thoughts, like tendrils of the Milky Way...the inessential loosening orbit.... Solitude is calling.

Today's theme was "places of reflection...where you go to just be." For other reflective places, check out my sidebar.

Next week is "the unveiling, showing your true self." Wow. I wish I wasn't disappearing for a couple weeks. Maybe I'll have my unveiling when I get back. See you then....

To play along and share your corner view, contact Jane at Spain Daily.

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29 comments:

  1. ErinJuly 8, 2009 at 10:16 AM

    Much peace to you on your upcoming journey. I too feel solitude tugging at my shirt tails.

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  2. TammyJuly 8, 2009 at 11:23 AM

    "I find myself, toes dangling, at the edge of the universe".....pain is such a solitary thing, and yet we all go through it and can understand the anguish it causes ourselves and others. Please know I am sending you a big hug in my heart and thoughts. You feel alone.....but please know you aren't. Your surrouding loved ones and those of us who have come to know you through the internet hold you up in hope and peace.

    Hugs ♥

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  3. caitlinJuly 8, 2009 at 1:32 PM

    Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. You're in my thoughts. Beautiful pictures.

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  4. JoyceJuly 8, 2009 at 1:53 PM

    I'm sorry to hear about the passing of your mom. I hope taking the journey will give you some peace. It is hard losing a loved one. No matter how rainy or sunny our days are their physcial presence are truly missed. Many hugs... xoxo

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  5. SaraJuly 8, 2009 at 1:55 PM

    I'm so sorry about the passing of your mother. Let that solitude take you where you need to be. xx

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  6. melJuly 8, 2009 at 3:10 PM

    Yes, I did email you! ;)

    I wish you peace and strength on your journey....

    ~blessings~

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  7. gardenmamaJuly 8, 2009 at 3:12 PM

    Dear Jenell I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. I have thought of you and have felt your quietness in this space. My prayers are with you as you take this journey. Many many blessings and deep peace to you.

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  8. BonnieJuly 8, 2009 at 4:05 PM

    wow, girl, you have a gift with words !!

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  9. Mama RoseJuly 8, 2009 at 6:28 PM

    Jenell, I am so sorry to hear about your mother. I know how hard it is losing a parent. You are not alone. Know that I hold you in my heart and prayers. I hold you in perfect harmony, surrounded by light and love.

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  10. ElizabethJuly 8, 2009 at 7:34 PM

    So beautiful. I'm sorry to hear about your mother's death and hope that your journey is a healing one.

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  11. sarahJuly 8, 2009 at 8:05 PM

    Many blessings to you as you navigate this transition time. Would it be rude to say that you write so beautifully from these depths of your soul.

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  12. AntoinetteJuly 9, 2009 at 12:43 AM

    I wish you well on your journey - your pilgrimage, (if I may use such a word), to your mother's place of peace and beauty.

    The call for solitude can be powerful, it's good that you're heeding that call.

    Wishing you peace and good wishes.

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  13. UnknownJuly 9, 2009 at 2:16 AM

    I missed something! Where you going?

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  14. KasiaJuly 9, 2009 at 2:56 AM

    I'm sorry to hear about your Mum...
    How beautiully written... Your words... So precious. Thank you for sharing.

    Lots of warm thoughts,
    Kasia

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  15. ;)July 9, 2009 at 3:41 AM

    So sorry... for your mom... :( I wish you peace...

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  16. JenellJuly 9, 2009 at 7:32 AM

    Tammy's note made me cry! I have never shared my burden with anyone or cried on anyone else's shoulder--other than my mom. And since she got sick, I have allowed myself to be cared for by friends a little more. So, Tammy, to hear you say the people who know me through the internet hold me up...that means a lot to me.

    All of you mean a lot to me. Your words buoy me up. Really, your friendship.

    sarah, thank you. It's hard to convey what's there, in the depths, especially when I don't quite know....

    Mon, I think you already know that my mom passed in March. Well, we had to wait until summer to bury her in her special place and have her memorial. We're leaving tomorrow for Montana.

    I've been withdrawn from the computer the last couple weeks and haven't really been able to express what's going on.

    I may check in a couple times while we're gone (or not), but will be back in a couple weeks. Now, off to the mundane: laundry, packing, and figuring out what is stinking up my refrigerator. :P

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  17. AnonymousJuly 9, 2009 at 3:45 PM

    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, Jenell. I'm sending peaceful thoughts your way.

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  18. JenellJuly 9, 2009 at 4:16 PM

    Thank you, Yoga Witch. Hugs to you.

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  19. CamJuly 15, 2009 at 11:59 AM

    Jenell, my friend...

    I wish you peace on this journey. Sending a big cosmic hug to you at the edge of the universe...

    Love & Light,
    Cam

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  20. CateJuly 15, 2009 at 3:00 PM

    jenell, my little cooking students mom died back in april. she left behind a 2, 3, and 4 year old. i see her in my dreams and in their faces. it is heartbreaking. i thought when my friend died that they are starting a journey, a long and difficult one. i pray for them for peace, for love. to you, i wish the same. i cannot imagine.

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  21. kaylovesvintageJuly 16, 2009 at 3:22 AM

    sorry to hear about your mum..

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  22. janeJuly 21, 2009 at 5:15 AM

    hi jenell- your words are breathtaking. sending you a big hug!
    jane

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  23. gardenmamaJuly 25, 2009 at 12:17 AM

    I know I have already commented in this space, but I continue to think of you Jenell. Wishing you peace... you are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  24. The Awakened HeartAugust 26, 2009 at 1:43 AM

    My thoughts are with you at this difficult time. Solitude is the only healing there is. Allow yourself the time and the space to travel wherever and whenever. May the places you love be healing for your heart.

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  25. UnknownSeptember 7, 2009 at 11:23 AM

    Missing your words here. Isn't bed a wonderful haven? Like clouds, like mother's arms. May healing continue.

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  26. A Cuban In LondonSeptember 25, 2009 at 3:42 AM

    I'm sure that most of us crave that solitude every now and then. You're lucky to have a corner of the world just for you, although the circumstances are somewhat sad.

    Greetings from London.

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  27. UnknownOctober 7, 2009 at 11:49 AM

    Missing your words, hoping you're finding peace in your time away, and whatever else you need. :)

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  28. RuthOctober 16, 2009 at 8:28 PM

    I thought you might be 'back' blogging as have noticed your comments about the place. Nice to see you around again! :)

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  29. JenellOctober 17, 2009 at 6:38 AM

    Although I'm not quite ready yet, I feel the pull to blog again. Thanks for thinking of me--Ruth and Mon. It warms my heart. :)

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