Happy Father's Day!

My first memories of my dad were about how much he and my mom loved each other. I remember, too, being part of that love. My dad worked hard and studied diligently in college, but he also knew how to have fun. Whether it was throwing me up high in the grocery store, the tickle bugs, camping trips, finding a steep sledding hill, or crankin' up the rock 'n' roll! As I got older, my dad made time to do things, just the two of us, like hiking down to the river, skiing, or taking a drive and just talking. That was really important to me, even in my "eye-rolling, I've-got-it-all-figured-out" teenager stage.

And now I have the pleasure of seeing this from a mom's point of view, seeing my daughter and husband together. On the tougher days, it's enough to make a mom green with jealousy, but mostly it's incredibly heart-warming. My daughter already knows what it means to be a girl (and a mother, in some sense). It's from her father that she learns what a good man is: someone who works hard to provide for his family and pursues his passions, someone who likes to figure things out himself but isn't afraid to ask for help or collaboration, someone who spins a good story but knows when to listen, someone who loves life and knows how to play. I see my husband inspire my daughter in ways that I do not. And for us, for now, that's just the way it should be.

I am so grateful for these two fine men in my life. I hope that they both know how very much I appreciate them.

What do you appreciate about the fathers in your life?

In Memorial

Today is Memorial Day, an American holiday to memorialize the troops who fought and died serving our country, the troops that continue to fight to keep our country free.

But it is not them of whom I think. No. My thoughts arise from a knot in my stomach and an anxious flutter in my heart. Grief for my mom’s passing burns through me like a wildfire. I think it just might consume the me that I used to be. I want to feel this sorrow, but I don’t want it to consume my family. So I’ve been keeping myself busy, perusing blogs, exercising?!, yardwork. Now that’s therapeutic.

On Saturday, I even went up to help my dad pull weeds in my mom’s secret garden.

We left the borage, fennel, mint, mugwort, and thyme, clearing just enough to plant some peppers.

My little sister and daughter lounged on the grass and consulted their pendulums as to whether they should work...

or not.

It was hard work, but the day was beautiful, and the company was good.

Anouk took this picture on our drive home….

Sunday I worked in my own yard, watering, tending and pulling weeds. Today I planted some canna lily rhizomes. In so doing, I discovered my long-neglected, living advent spiral. And woven into it, I uncovered archaeological remnants from four different fairy homes. They’d been destroyed by the elements and buried in leaves.

I believe they were the second to last of such fairy offerings. This, I believe, was the last.

It was built shortly after one beautiful autumn parkday last year, when a younger friend of my daughter’s said, “Anouk, you are a real girl.” At first my heart swelled with sweetness that her friend saw her genuineness. As her friend continued, I realized it was not a compliment. She proceeded to pronounce another friend the best fairy leprechaun girl ever.

Amazingly, there was no charge around this interchange. Anouk didn’t even seem to notice. I wanted to interject, “You don’t know her like I do!” But I didn’t. I realized that this is how it must be. It wasn’t long after that she lost her last baby tooth and started getting excited about independence. She is leaving the kingdom of childhood.

I just hope that it’s not too much of a mad rush. I hope that she finds pause to commune with the nature spirits…to daydream and breathe…to keep the vestiges of innocence kindled in her spirit.

I wish that for us all. Perhaps if we remembered our original natures, we’d forego war and have a garden party instead.

What is disease?

So far we know that viruses are bundles of genome encased in a protein sheath. Although they do not appear to be alive or self-directed, scientists don’t have a conclusive answer. However, almost any scientist or doctor you talk with will tell you that they’re not alive. They will also tell you that they are infectious agents that attack living organisms. This is the pathogenic model for medicine that has gone largely unquestioned since its inception in the late 1800s.

Like many endeavors, from discoveries to inventions to works of art, much depends on what came before. The idea of microorganisms dates as far back as written history goes, but it was all wrapped up in God’s will, evil spirits, and curses. After the Middle Ages, humankind started focusing on intellectual pursuits.

"When Sir Isaac Newton (1642-1727) revolutionized physics with his studies of optics and gravity, he perceived the universe as an immense mechanical construct, a giant clockwork that scientists could probe by analyzing various parts. He inaugurated a new scientific methodology, known as reductionism. According to the assumptions underlying this approach, insights gained by studying bits and pieces of nature could be fitted together like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle to eventually explain the workings of the cosmos." David Suzuki, Tree: A Life Story

As scientific methods and instruments became more and more precise, scientists were able to isolate smaller and smaller particles in controlled environments.

In 1898 the first virus was discovered by Martinus Beijerinck. While Beijerinck studied botanical microbiology in the Netherlands, two scientists in France were studying microbiology in relation to animals. They were Louis Pasteur and Antoine Bechamp. They were working to discover the cause of disease occurring in silkworms in France. And, although they were contemporaries, the fire of belief and the politics of discovery between these two was palpable. The way in which they experimented, interpreted, and assembled their data was vastly different.

Through Antoine Bechamp’s silkworm experiments, he found that animals carry microorganisms in them all the time, microorganisms that symbiotically assist in the metabolism of their host. He noticed that in systems that changed from healthy to diseased, those microorganisms become pleomorphic, or mutate. He called his theory the cellular disease theory, or pleomorphism. Bechamp ascertained that, only when a biological system becomes imbalanced does disease occur. Viruses, which work to catabolically break down or scavenge toxic waste, have a medium in which to do their work. They de-toxify the dead cellular matter. It is only when disease is widespread that viruses become widespread. Thus, he contended, disease comes first.

Louis Pasteur, on the other hand, saw microorganisms as the cause of the silkworm disease. Not only that, but he asserted that each microorganism was a specific disease, arising from the external environment. He believed that these specific diseases, like the one affecting the silkworms, as well as diseases like rabies or influenza, attack healthy cells and weaken or destroy them. Pasteur called his idea the the germ theory of disease.

Pasteur’s ideas were not all well-received, and his success was controversial. Even the famous nurse, Florence Nightingale, published a critique of the theory.

“The specific disease doctrine is the grand refuge of weak, uncultured, unstable minds, such as now rule the medical profession. There are no specific diseases; there are specific disease conditions.” Florence Nightingale, 1860 (Excerpted from The Dream and Lie of Louis Pasteur by R.B. Pearson)

There are numerous books written both in favor of and oppostition to the germ theory. Perhaps it was because his father was a veteran of the Napoleonic Wars that he found favor and support.

“In 1863, Emperor Napoleon III asked Pasteur to assist France in combating various “diseases” of wine that often caused exported French wine to go bad before it reached its destination.” (Excerpted from http://www.answers.com/topic/louis-pasteur)

Perhaps that is why, with his alliance, Pasteur’s germ theory prevailed over Bechamp’s cellular disease theory. Whatever the case may be, his theory became the basis for modern medicine, along with the advent of immunizations and hygienic practices.

The fallout from the germ and subsequent immunization theories is that modern medicine is pathological and curative-based. It looks toward disease and not toward health. You might argue that immunizations are preventative, but their efficacy is also yet to be proven. When my daughter was six, she was out of school for a good portion of the year. She had an incessant, hacking cough that made her stomach spasm and dry heave. It was loud and painful. My husband and I felt powerless to help our little girl. We decided to take her to the emergency room. The doctor diagnosed her with whooping cough. My daughter had one more series of shots left in her childhood immunizations, but my husband and I had made the choice to discontinue them. We didn’t have internet at the time (weird, huh?), and even though we have a great library system, there wasn’t much literature on immunizations. I remember reading What Every Parent Should Know About Childhood Immunization by Jamie Murphy. I told the doctor that she didn’t have the last of the series, and she said that she should be covered. However, she said that she, herself, had acquired whooping cough as an adult, even though she was fully immunized against it. She said the vaccine didn’t have a high success rate. To add insult to injury, there was nothing they could do for my daughter. I think I might have made her up an herbal preparation from the immunization book that I read.

I didn’t make a big deal about the fact that our family had chosen not to finish immunizing our daughter. But when her doctor realized she hadn’t completed her series, he wanted to schedule an appointment. He was livid at me when I told him our decision. He angrily pressed me with questions. Although I didn’t feel very self-confident, I told him that I wasn’t convinced of their effectiveness. I told him I believed I could support our immune system through diet and herbs. I told him that I didn’t like the side effects of the vaccines or the ingredients in them (such as MSG, animal material, aluminum salts, formaldehyde, and mercury). He told me that they don’t have thimerosol (a mercury-based preservative) in vaccines anymore. I later found out that this wasn’t entirely true. They phased it out in 2001. This means that the pharmaceutical industry doesn’t make most childhood vaccinations with mercury anymore. The ones that do contain it, have “acceptable” amounts. And there were still some mercury containing vaccines in doctor’s offices and warehouses across the country.

Needless to say, we don’t go to the doctor very often anymore. I came to realize what a big industry it was, embroiled in bureaucracy and dogmatism. The whole system is not bad. Sometimes surgery is necessary. And there are wonderful individual doctors, who truly believe in what they do and genuinely want to help people. Unfortunately, they are kept too inhumanely busy to do much research. Research is what’s needed. Doctors are scientists, too. And scientific theory must be continually reexamined, renewed. Life is constantly changing. Maybe there are new ways of seeing. New questions arise. Previously discredited theories or indigenous wisdom can be looked at anew. Perhaps Antoine Bechamp’s theory that cells change, that a bacteria could mutate to become a virus, as a response to a diseased, biological ecology, should be revisited. Some scientists are reexamining old paradigms.

Here is a video of an amazing microscope called the Ergonom. You can see living tissue through high resolution lenses without dye or altering the medium. You can see mutating microorganisms just as Bechamp proposed.

“…as scientists investigated the parts of living organisms, they found the parts themselves were made up of parts—molecules—which were in turn assemblages of atoms, which were ultimately made up of quarks, the (so far) irreducible structures of all matter. At the quark level, there was nothing to distinguish life from nonlife.” David Suzuki, Tree: A Life Story

“Recent advances in genome science have revealed an additional mechanism of cooperation among species. Living organisms, it turns out, actually integrate their cellular communities by sharing their genes. It had been thought that genes are passed on only to the progeny of an individual organism through reproduction. Now scientists realize that genes are shared not only among individual members of a species, but also among members of different species. The sharing of genetic information via gene transfer speeds up evolution since organisms can acquire “learned” experiences from other organisms. [Nitz, et al, 2003] Given this sharing of genes, organisms can no longer be seen as disconnected entities; there is no wall between species. Daniel Drell, manager of the Department of Energy’s microbial genome program told Science in (2001 294:1634): “…we can no longer comfortably say what is a species anymore.” [Pennisi 2001] Bruce Lipton, The Biology of Belief

Isn’t that incredible?! New models of our world are constantly being born. New inspiration is realized.

“All theory, dear friend, is gray, but the golden tree of life springs ever green.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The public is increasingly embracing naturopathic medicine. But we must be ever vigilant. We must always reexamine theories and not take them as ultimate truth. That reminds me of one of my favorite quotes.

“Do not be idolatrous about or bound to any doctrine, theory, or ideology, even Buddhist ones. All systems of thought are guiding means; they are not absolute truth.” Thich Nhat Hanh (excerpted from Dharma Gaia ed. Allan Hunt Badiner)

Cultivate critical thinking, but do not abandon your heart.

What does my heart say? I am alive!

What is a virus?

The first question the swine flu epidemic brings to mind is, “What is a virus?” I know that there is a difference between getting a bacteriological infection and getting a virus. I know that one can be treated with antibiotics and the latter cannot. It wasn’t until a couple weeks ago that my sister told me that viruses are not alive. My doctor and biologist friends ardently confirm this. So that’s why they can’t be treated with antibiotics; the word “antibiotic” means “against life,” and viruses are not alive! Well, um, shrug, that’s where my knowledge stops and the questions begin. They sure seem to be a life force (a sort of consciousness). So if they are not life, what is life? And if they’re not alive, what are they?

Wikipedia has a long article detailing viruses. The article refers to them as “infectious agents”. They’re like little seed packets: RNA or DNA strands packed inside a protein case. In the influenza virus, the protein cases are covered in little spiky projections. These are protein, which help the virus attach to a cell and enzymes, which help the virus enter the host cell. Viruses can’t reproduce on their own. So, once they inject their RNA or DNA into the host cell, they co-opt the cell’s ability to reproduce. And then they reproduce so much that they weaken the cell and cause it to burst. This is like the seed pod opening and spreading its seeds. Thus the infection spreads. This activity requires no food, but it does require the host cell’s energy. And, although not self-mobile, they do adapt to the environment by shifting their protein casing, or mutating.

There are several classes of viruses, the one currently in the news being Type A Influenza. This type of influenza mutates more frequently than others. Saturday’s SFGate article stated, “Hospitals and public health departments throughout California, where six of the American cases have been found, were told Friday to increase surveillance of the rare strain of flu that combines genetic material from humans, pigs and birds.” Because this is a new virus that has evolved from animals to humans and has continued to spread from human to human, the World Health Organization’s pandemic alert is now at phase 4. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention , people are potentially contagious for seven days after onset of the illness or while symptomatic. The virus is transmitted through coughing or sneezing but, according to the CDC, can be acquired by touching something that a sick person has touched. “We know that some viruses and bacteria can live 2 hours or longer on surfaces like cafeteria tables, doorknobs, and desks. Frequent handwashing will help you reduce the chance of getting contamination from these common surfaces.” Wait a minute. Back up. “Viruses…can live”?!

It appears that the verdict is not out on whether or not viruses are alive. While they don’t meet the requirements for life in the way that we normally think, they are so close as to be arguable. Scientific American has an excellent article that takes that to task. Perhaps we need to further define what life is?

Swine Flu Pandemic Panic

Reports started percolating Saturday about an influenza epidemic in Mexico. It has been dubbed “the swine flu,” because it is a sickness that originated in pigs. So far it is believed that approximately eighty people have died from it. Thousands are sick. Schools are closed. Public events have been shut down. People who must go out wear masks. But the media doesn’t give me too much time to be sad for the people of Mexico. The virus is spreading to my country—and possibly yours. The news is inciting panic about the swine flu becoming a global pandemic. A part of me wants to turn away. I’ve heard this story before. Mad cow disease. Bird flu. West Nile. Death. Fear, fear, fear. Enter the pharmaceutical (or pesticide) industries, who don their flowing capes and “save the day.” Then the media, like hungry leeches, latch onto another victim. This is what I want to turn away from.

Don’t get me wrong. I feel for the people of Mexico. There is a reality here. People are dying from this virus. People are afraid. I am afraid. However, I do believe that the more you think things through yourself, the less helpless you are. You may still be afraid. You may not have all the answers. But you’ll be empowered. I’d like to take some time in the next few days to think about this out-loud. I have questions….

A Poem for Earth Day

Hopi Prophecy

“You have been telling people that this is the Eleventh Hour, now you must go back and tell the people that this is the Hour. And there are things to be considered…

Where are you living?
What are you doing?
What are your relationships?
Are you in right relation?
Where is your water?

Know your garden.
It is time to speak your truth.
Create your community.
Be good to each other.
And do not look outside yourself for the leader.

Then he clasped his hands together, smiled, and said, “This could be a good time! There is a river flowing now very fast. It is so great and swift that there are those who will be afraid. They will try to hold on to the shore. They will feel they are being torn apart and will suffer greatly. Know the river has its destination. The elders say we must let go of the shore, push off into the middle of the river, keep our eyes open, and our heads above the water.

And I say, see who is there with you and celebrate. At this time in history, we are to take nothing personally, least of all, ourselves. For the moment that we do, our spiritual growth and journey comes to a halt.

The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!

Banish the word ‘struggle’ from your attitude and your vocabulary. All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration.

We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.”

Oraibi, Arizona
Hopi Nation
June 8, 2000

New Year's Revolution

For Christmas this year my daughter got me David Suzuki’s Green Guide. Although it details the catastrophic impact we have on our planet, it wasn’t at all paralyzing. In fact, David Suzuki outlines meaningful actions that we can take to change our relationship to agriculture, transportation, energy use, and politics. I am definitely going to be referring back to various sections to slowly change my awareness and habits. There are so many possibilities, from simple to more challenging. It is empowering. Suzuki also includes references for further research (books, documentaries and websites). Here is one of many lists he suggests:

12 Guiding Principles of Sustainable Consumption

1. Remember the big picture. Spend less time worrying about plastic bags and disposable cups and more time thinking about where you live, energy use in your home, how often and how far you drive (and fly), and what you eat.


2. Don’t buy stuff that you don’t need. Among the three environmental commandments—reduce, reuse, and recycle—reduce is by far the most important.


3. Make food, not waste. Before you buy something, think ahead to when you’ll stop using it. Every product, when you’re finished with it, should be food for either the biological economy (readily biodegradable materials) or the industrial economy (recyclable or reusable raw materials for new products).


4. Buy local. The closer to home a product is grown, built, or made, generally the lower transportation costs associated with pollution.


5. Go for quality, not quantity. Select durable products and maximize their reuse through regular maintenance and care.


6. Support renewable energy. Seek out products and businesses that rely on wind, solar, geothermal, or other renewable sources of power.


7. Make healthy choices. Avoid purchasing or using toxic and hazardous products.


8. Look for a high proportion of recycled content. To fulfill the promise of recycling requires people to purchase recycled products.


9. Demand better options…. The more people vote for environmentally informed candidates, speak up on behalf of innovative green solutions, and push for change, the sooner the shift towards a sustainable future will come about.

Among the many suggestions, there were only a couple things that didn’t vibe with me. I don’t agree with Suzuki’s recommendation to eat highly processed soy products for regular meat substitutes, and I don’t agree that we should use compact fluorescent lights. Here’s an article a friend of mine wrote on CFLs, and another on a more healthful alternative—incandescent lights. David Suzuki is human and has his own perceptual lense. He is a scientist and a modern man. I would prefer more back to basics ideas, but that is my perceptual lense. So despite the fact that I don’t agree with everything he says, I do sense that David Suzuki truly loves the natural world. He has integrity, and I trust him.

Today I signed up for his Nature Challenge. He sends a weekly e-newsletter, suggesting things you can do. Check out his website. If your library doesn’t have his book, request it. And if you just can’t get it, his website is very informative. It is largely addressed to his fellow Canadians, but the principles are universal.

And what’s more universal than time? I appreciate that Suzuki addresses our busy lifestyles. He says, “If you’re time-poor because of work or other obligations, then you’re much more likely to drive than cycle or take transit, more likely to eat fast food or junk food than prepare a healthy meal, and more likely to buy inefficient or potentially toxic products (because you lack the time to do any research). When people are time poor, they have less time to spend on the activities that create happiness, such as socializing with friends, pursuing hobbies, and engaging with their communities.” This, in itself, is revolutionary. And we homeschoolers are leaders in that front. We have time to figure out our relationships with ourselves, each other, the environment, and the spirit.

While I ardently believe in homeschooling as a revolutionary act, I have been pretty loose with my ideals and my homeschooling this year. I want to start working towards health again. So, while I don’t normally have New Year's resolutions, I really need to reassess my life and clarify my intentions. But I felt like the list in my head kept growing and growing. I’m so far from who I want to be! How did this happen?! I was feeling a lot of anxiety as the New Year approached. When I actually wrote my list down, however, it wasn’t so long. And, in fact, it was basically in line with what Suzuki says above, a wish to spend time on activities that create happiness, such as socializing with friends, pursuing hobbies, and engaging with my community.

This is my New Year’s wish to all of you.

Time Change

With the rise of industrialism and the transcontinental railroad in the United States, it became necessary to establish time zones . They were introduced in 1883 and codified into law in 1918. This enabled commerce to be shipped and tracked in a timely manner. People, once used to directing their gaze to the sky or to the trusty town clock, now had time streamlined with others in their nation. While this is helpful for accountability, as well as scientific measurement, it also creates a schism between an individual and their personal relationship to time.

There are numerous ways to perceive time. What is time, anyway? It is the measurement of the movement of objects (or the procession of events) through space. Historically, however, time was important to people as a tool for understanding the duration of the day and seasons. Native Americans (and many “primitive” cultures) named the months after foods that were available during that time. Their survival depended on their intimate connection with the cycle of the seasons.

When standard time zones were made into law, Daylight Savings Time was also written in. This addition manipulated the standard time so that during the equinoxes daylight would be conserved by one hour. However, people were not ready for it, and it was repealed. The idea was toyed with until 1966, when it was written into law again with the possibility of exemption. Among the states today, Hawaii and most of Arizona claim exemption. Why was Daylight Savings Time so important? We already had standardized time to create accountability. However, the seasons still progressed as they do and became a hindrance after the autumn equinox, when the tilt of the Earth angles North America away from the sun, and hence, away from the light. Our current law stipulates that at 2 a.m. on the first Sunday in November we “fall back” or set our clocks back on hour, and on the first Sunday in March we “spring forward” or set our clocks forward one hour. What would be the benefit of this? Perhaps if we get up earlier, we will work more? This further manipulation of time is also beneficial to economic ends. It feels somewhat like a ball and chain.

When I worked an 8-5 job, Daylight Savings Time always took some adjustment of my circadian rhythms. It always felt like jet lag. I’ll have to admit that, in the last three years I’ve been homeschooling, I haven’t really been affected by it. For some reason, this year I have felt the pull of the season more acutely. It’s getting dark a couple hours earlier than it was during the summer. Consequently, I want to go to bed a couple hours earlier. This confounds my family, who knows that my "normal" bedtime is at 10. It is a little disconcerting. Bedtime at 8?! This might seem like a handicap when I normally see time as so limited anyway. But I’ve chosen to establish a different relationship with time. When my body is tired, I go to bed. Fortunately I have been afforded the opportunity to homeschool. The ball and chain is gone and so my belief that time needs to be saved.

The question remains: How can we honor our circadian rhythms—our relationship to the light? As time seems to be so inextricably linked with the economy, how can we work within the constraints of our modern world? Of capitalism? In what ways can we re-imagine it? This last question normally leads people to think about socialism, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about creating a new paradigm. These questions are so amazingly complex, that it’s difficult to know where to begin. Respectful dialog is always a positive step, though.

Another step may be to start at the beginning, to re-establish our relationship with the processes of our Earth and its relationship with the Sun. To work with our rhythms instead of against them. To get to know the growing cycle of our food. To work with the light instead of against it.

“It used to be that inner and outer light were one. When it became dark, a candle was lit. People sat around the light; it was a precious thing. And something enlightening always radiated from it. Today light can be had without effort by pressing a button. We can take light for granted; an unconscious and loveless relationship arises,” Manfred Schmidt-Bryabant says in The Spiritual Tasks of the Homemaker. “We cannot do without electricity any more. But we must create a way of compensating inwardly for what has been lost through external aids.”

Future Reading (any other suggestions?):

Finding Our Way: Leadership for an Uncertain Time by Margaret Wheatley

The Post-Corporate World: Life After Capitalism by David Korten

Capitalism at the Crossroads: Aligning Business, Earth, and Humanity by Stuart Hart

Express Your Freedom

We inhabit a beautiful country and, beyond boundaries, a beautiful planet, an unfathomable universe, a wonder-full you. Our task is to find our will to live in an intimate relationship with all these things. Create the world you Imagine. Express your freedom.

I do not see the big loom (or the weaver!), but I do see some of the marvelous tapestry. I do not know the outcome of this presidential election. I do not care who you vote for; just vote. Vote your conscience. Get involved in your world. Heed your call--whatever it is!

I will be voting for Barack Obama. I think he can inspire and awaken our nation.
Click here for more videos from Vote For Change

Gifts...

Aren't gifts awesome?

I mean, there's the gift of life, the gift of having the necessities taken care of, the gift of little things people do for each other daily that are often taken for granted....

And then there's the gift that appears - unexpected. It's not your birthday, not Christmas, Easter, or any of the many Hallmark holidays. But suddenly a gift appears.

You open it up and it's a __________. It doesn't even matter what IT is. Well, it sort of matters. I mean, it wouldn't be quite so touching to get a book about how to heal your inner bitch or some god-aweful lacy outfit that even your great grandmother wouldn't be caught dead in.

The best part about this gift is that someone was thinking about you. There was a moment in their day when something made them think of you.

Today, I received a gift from Michelle Bornt. She found a cigarette vending machine that has been re-imagined into a miniature art dispenser. It totally made my day! And it inspired me. I dig it when people create. I love INGENUITY and THE UNEXPECTED and AUDACITY.

And I love my friends. Thank you, Michelle.